Mirage

a tiny prism on your lashes

blinked into oblivion 

like a tear the size of a spider’s footprint

throwing rainbows on your cheeks

won’t you tell me what you’re thinking of

perchance the tiny raindrops misting down

faces in the rain, laughing and killing 

the uneven streets tripping your feet

tiny prisms throwing shapes 

a hint of a hand, of a finger or foot 

I see them severed in the rain suspended, 

droplets like blood, breathtaking, beautiful, a wall of mirage 

won’t  you tell me what you’re thinking of 

thus, so, the clouds rain down upon our heads 

images of terror, seen in the night 

bared to the light of day 

and so the clouds bleed upon us,

a tiny prism in your lashes 

throwing rainbows on your cheek, 

smallest speck of imagined blood 

I should welcome you to my madness and yet, 

the clouds are bleeding for the both of us

(c) 2013

Always

i pour out my soul on paper
in words you've heard a thousand times
i want you to hear them
in a thousand different languages, sung to the sky
always for you
always for you
the years i've fled,
down the roads to hell
and the tears i've shed,
in remembrance of what i had
i've spent my years searching
always for you
always for you
it's not easy to explain,
but i'll try my best
when i chase a memory
when i gaze off into the distance
proclaim i think of nothing
it's never anything bad,
it's always you
always you
i had a castle in the sky
where i could sit and dream
always of you
i fell through the clouds
trying to change
realizing you love me as i am
and my tears should dry
it's all for you
all for you


(c) 2013

Nothing

they say that nothing comes from nothing
but i had nothing
nothing given, nothing gotten
emptiness and incarnadine
what is now, what was then
and all the in-betweens
i've made a mistake, then another and more
i've left my harbor, made for your shore
i've given up my nothing,
all i want is dreaming
i've looked in all the wrong places
but now i have you

they say that nothing comes from nothing
and everything is something
but i've been less than nothing, and evermore
but now i have you
give me a purpose, a deal
give me a truth, proof, feel
give me your heart for mine
in this emptiness and incarnadine
but now i have you
and i want nothing more
it's easy to forget, but not to forget
the past grips too tightly
but now i have you.


(c) 2013

Mia Bella

i want to tell you something
a word, perhaps a monologue
i want to tell you a story, of the day i fell in love
i was sitting in a coffee shop
a tiny, gorgeous coffee shop
waiting for an old friend i'd never met
a tall willow goddess, kissed by fire
i never thought i could, but hey i did
it just took a kiss, sitting on a ledge
over water and listening to a wish on the air
i could always breathe with you, i always can
in the morning, you sigh and smile like
it's your first day on earth
with you i can gentle my heart, when you make me wild
you give me my glory days
and i can only try to return them in kind
i was drinking nothing, too scared to sip
i saw your eyes, your blushing smile
i'd waited so long
all i wanted, in that second
was to kiss you on the first of may, with ribbons in your hair
you make me sing again, and dance in the rain
make my heart heal - i had too much pain
nowadays i don't remember
the terrors in the night, not when you're near me
i would spend the days of my life with you
the years of my heart's beating thrum
i've fallen, moth to a flame
gods above you give me a reason, a reason to live
days and nights sleepless, words and thousands of words
you know me better than i know myself
and i love the picture you've painted
i would give you the sweetest dreams, darling
until the day we fall into the cold, hard ground
and plant bloodred tulips on our grave


(c) 2013

Waves of...

there was no beginning
no ending near in sight, simple continuation
a road on and on until the completion
spaced evenly-the road signs
tell you stay, go, stop, no...
until they all fall down
a breath of what could be
if all the world could cry
tears like an ocean, or the ocean like tears
waves of sorrow
for the beginning's end
and what could never be


(c) 2013

Waiting softly

the girl sitting in the cafe
sipping slowly, so slowly
it's good for the soul
she can't help but smile, sigh, be sad
staring out a window with no glass
the passersby - the same old faces
an old friend, a tottering drunk
and the man she heard play drums
in an old band, in her childhood...when,
the springtime traced across her cheeks
she misses him
she's waiting for him
there's a woman she knew from somewhere
beautiful, sad, a voice like a mavis
a baby on her hip and a sparkling eye
she's singing, Hallelujah
she can't help but smile, cry, laugh...
it's good for the soul


(c) 2013

Rome

it was as if nothing had ever existed
who am i tonight, tomorrow or yesterday?
strange days and stranger nights,
spooked from the corpses, such scavengers
the tang of gunpowder in the air
shadows growing, ever longer

blank and broken - shattered by nothing
you're in the danger zone, a sweet destination
i can hear your rejoicing
gagging, choking, spitting out your venom
there are no magic words to save you

you sigh so prettily when your cigarette burns low
stubbing it out in the palm of your hand
just an excuse for pain
a wedding of heart and soul, musical, innocent
i remember your gasp of pleasure
sinfully exotic, touched by fire

you've always reminded me of fair Italy
burnished gold by a setting sun
unbowed you, you hold on, unbent, cling...and so broken,
your eyes speak of untold nights
where a mellow breeze kissed you
and tears made their way down your cheeks

the shirtless man on the bicycle waved to you
all you could do was cry and tell me
about your last lover, and how, like Rome,
you fell.
trembling in the cold night air, saying No...
he refused to listen.

(c) 2013

Wishes

glassine, shimmering, half-lighted wishes
mounds, piles, heaps of words
i wish, i wish, i wish, wish, wish, wish
lips tremble to expel them
and what is more, they lack the fortitude
to come true, truest, truant wishes
piled in a corner, chips and fragments, mile-high
in a room with no view
wish, wish, wish, giants, monsters and men
don't tell me about your women
sighs, sorrows, forget-me-not wishes
don't tell me about your wilderness thoughts
it's a lack of fidelity, innocence
too many mirrors
i wish, i wish, i wish, wish, wish, wish


(c) 2013

Lose

caught in darkness nigh on death
solitary slumbering in utter blackness
emptiness, a void
dancing on the edge of falling
crying out a single word
echoes of a departed soul
all of this and nothing, but everything and something
what to do with all i have
and all i've had to lose

another thing, an amoeba
a lifelike semblance of culture
single-celled, inorganic, manufactured
round, around it goes
this thing, to remain in motion
feeds, feeds, continually gorging itself
on others' emotions
 

(c) 2013

Smouldering

they say you paid for me
cash for kisses, dime and dollar
each time i could i said yes
pennies for my troubles and they get
darling they get to stare
down the barrel of a smoking gun
each time i could i said yes
slipping under sheets, satin and silk
paid you in gold and love
you spend so much time thinking
and they say you paid for me
gave soul and heart, life for me
i wasn't asking you for a solution
i was asking for sympathy

dime and dollar, paid upfront
watching you sigh and gaze into the distance
down the barrel of a smoking gun
i'll always say yes, to the love that we swore
your heart is my bible
and they tell me you paid for me
silk, satin and gold
love, you're my devil

with your lips and your smile
i feel as if i could dive down
deep into your eyes
i'd sacrifice a life for you
my life for you, love would be the devil
smouldering

there's a song in my heart for you
and a quiver in my soul
i pretend i could make amends
but they say you paid for me
gave soul and heart, hope for me
i'm not asking you for a declaration
not a sonnet
don't say you want me, that you need me
that you love me...
it's no good - you bought me
i have all the time in the world
it's written in the stars
it's understood


(c) 2013

Waves

until the waves
rolling over still water
hush the shores that time forgot
with simple, salty kisses
along the pebbled line
softly, softly, gentle
passing in the shallows of a mind
hidden in the nowhere
where the devils romp
bitter with the tide
softly, softly, gentle
lonesome travellers fight
over their hidden prize
the waves hush the shores
and the depths of the water
softly hold


(c) 2013

Pinprick

you have your eyes in the wrong place
staring out of the back of your mind
contemplate and regenerate
your life is a suicide case

drifting ghosts and long walks at night
crack and break beneath the weight of the past
that kiss was your last

sorrow and a silence
a heart too big for your soul
a tiny life, pinprick
don't do it, i beg you

last time was the first time
for waking in the night
crying, screams and blood on your hands
i do believe i love you

all your cracks and sad eyes
add up in my mind
to create a perfection so flawed
sanity is overrated and waiting for the wheel
gets you nowhere


(c) 2013

Take

i feel like my heart
beating. beating, deep within
too big, it's too big for my chest
i can't hold it in

take my heart
take it. take it, it's yours anyhow
i ask you, share my burden
these moments alone
together

you've given me yours
trust. trust in me, and i you
fantastical creatures, both
scarred and marred by time and love
our stories

two and one, the same
differences proclaimed, contained
so much tortured gentleness
firelight and wrists above our heads
so close and yet not touching
closer now

hearts entwined
what more to ask, in limbo
two worlds shared
in limbo

(c) 2013