Being Young

with lungs full of high priced cigarettes
and a stomach full of cheap whiskey
with Fall Out Boy blaring
through shitty speakers
with no bass
is this what it means to be young?

to drown bitterness and sorrow
with drops of loathing
clothed in alcohol

to suffocate self hatred
with nicotine and bloody tears
weeping down sides

is this what it means to be young?
to express yourself with slow suicide
pretending to be okay
until even you believe it
sometimes

i've never felt better
am i lying?

i'm the prettiest fuckup
with the best taste in tobacco
and caffeinated blood

i'll make a pretty corpse, it's true
sex, drugs, rock and roll
what's there to miss?

rat-a-tat-tat on the door
is it someone i love
or a reminder of all the things i've done?

with lungs aching from classy smoke
and a breaking heart
from the past
with music and daydreams and failure
is this what it means to succeed?

burnt to the filter
inhale slowly and it won't kill you
sip it like it matters
and maybe it will
hope that it will get better
and maybe it could

they say it never gets better than this
and this is pretty fucked up



(c) 2015